Music as a golden thread

Have you ever been moved to tears by music? It's such a mystical phenomenon... Music is my constant companion. Born into a music oriented family, classical vinyls were often playing in our house. My piano teacher mother introduced us early, though as a toddler I told her that "I know better", so she landed me with her colleague for actual classes a few years later. I always had a magical connection with music. And with time, music became an inspiration, refuge and most importantly a mediator to feel/manage emotions... meanwhile...

"I know better." - has become the mantra of my mind.

Both sides of it: knowing better or not knowing enough and hiding away...

I'm still waking up every morning with a random music in my head, something the subconscious burps up... quite an entertainment. I had a love-hate relationship with this phenomena: loved the surprise, the unpredictable nature of it, yet it can be unwelcome, annoying, and most recently: why am I not waking up in Silent Bliss?!

I wanted to write about how music connected me first before big changes happened... then this morning a friend of mine guided me in a meditation about the relation with the body. It was very nourishing, beautiful, and suddenly I realised that Music is a golden thread of teaching in my life, mediating, interpreting buried emotions... guiding forward. It's like an aura, an extension of my body, a layer that's both experienced as external and internal. I feel music like a bodily sensation. An inclusive, enveloping dance of wavelengths. And it communicates... guides and predicts without words, escaping my mind's way to grasp, to know better/not knowing enough. Music moves us in the inside. Subtler than words, subtler than categories. Music opened me to Freedom. This one: Bobby McFerrin's live concert.

This human. Their loving, joyful friendship. The freedom they PLAY with. Pure expression.

Gibberish words. Free IN music. Blew my mind away. I wanted to be this free...

Few years later "this free" transitioned to another level, with another bodily sensation when I stumbled upon the first video about Awakening: all the cells in my body were dancing, and I felt a firy urge to find out what that man's talking about and be This Free... he was talking about our True Nature.

Few years on I was stuck in my life, hungry for something subtly beautiful, yet I didn't know where to find it, how to search for it. All I felt that I have to be ready for something. I found a pretty CD in a second-hand shop, its cover art just calling me, but it was priced 3 times more than the rest of the CDs. Asked them to listen in, and there it was: the magic I was hungry for! And like a fresh breeze a thought passed my mind: "this is how I want to feel in a relationship".

Got out of the crumbling one and soon met someone who is still an inspiration, a source of subtle musical beauty as well as a flame of love and a shared love for music.

Today it has become clear that in order to avoid the misinterpretations of my mind, Life guides me via music... All I have to do is be quiet and listen… and beyond music or any sounds, there's the pre-existing silence. The silence of the listener - the disappearance of the "me". Merging in, melting in... What guides you without words? What are you listening to? What remains when completely melted in... surrender in silence to something beyond our minds' knowing better, or even understands... you remain as you are.

I will share some inspirational music here that touches me. Sometimes they have words, sometimes gibberish, sometimes none... I have no purpose with this, just overflowing Love.